


Baby Honey

by minthalo



Category: Buzzfeed The Try Guys (Web Series)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - High School, Cuddling & Snuggling, F/M, Fake Baby, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Pining Eugene, Sharing Clothes, Sharing a Bed, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-01
Updated: 2018-10-04
Packaged: 2019-07-20 14:13:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 14,280
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16138928
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minthalo/pseuds/minthalo
Summary: "Yeah, I thought you knew we were doing the fake baby project this week?”"I did, and he’s doing his with his girlfriend, Ned is going to do his with Ariel, I don’t know any girls in this class, not well enough to do this project with, and I really don’t want to do it with a stranger."He hums, “well, we get to pick our partners, yeah?”“yeah, I’m pretty sure.”Eugene thinks for a moment, mentally going through everyone in the class before he nods, “yeah, don’t worry Zach. You won’t be doing this with a stranger.”Or the fic where Zach and Eugene are paired up to take care of a baby doll for a week





	1. Monday

**Author's Note:**

> I don't think I've ever been so motivated to write a fic in my entire life i wrote so much in the last week its wild anyway i hope y'all like this new au!!!

Eugene walks into his second period classroom, seeing Zach already sitting at their shared table, doodling on a notebook. Eugene places his bag on top of the table, sitting in his seat next to Zach.

Zach looks up and gives him a weak smile, “hey.”

Eugene tilts his head, “What’s wrong, buddy?”

“Did you see Keith’s snap story this morning?”

“The picture of him and Becky and their fake baby? Yeah, I thought you knew we were doing the fake baby project this week?”

"I did, and he’s doing his with his girlfriend, Ned is going to do his with Ariel, I don’t know any girls in this class, not well enough to do this project with, and I really don’t want to do it with a stranger.”

He hums, “well, we get to pick our partners, yeah?”

“yeah, I’m pretty sure.”

Eugene thinks for a moment, mentally going through everyone in the class before he nods, “yeah, don’t worry Zach. You won’t be doing this with a stranger.”

“What?” Zach says, confused.

Eugene doesn’t answer, instead he looks up at the front where their teacher, Mrs. Tibble, is standing, getting everyone’s attention up at her now that class has officially started.

“Good day, everybody. I’m sure you’ve all heard from your friends in my first hour class that you’re getting your babies today, that would be correct. I have the box of them up here in the front, with me, they’re already programmed and ready for the week. Now first you’re going to pick your partners, then come up grab a baby, one of the small bags full of the stuff you’ll need, and a rubric for the project, go back to your seats with your partner, identify the sex of your baby, we’ll go over the rubric as a class and before the end of class you’ll have a name for your baby. Any questions before we begin?”

Eugene raises his hand, the only person who does. It surprises Zach, he never asks anything in class, usually because he’s smart and doesn’t need extra explanation.

“Yes, Eugene?”

“There are more guys than girls in this class, if you’re not assigning partners, can I do the project with Zach?”

Zach turns to look at him, he didn’t know what he was expecting Eugene to say but that definitely wasn’t on his mind.

Mrs. Tibble takes a moment to count the students in the class, making note of all the girls and guys, realizing Eugene is right. “Yeah, of course, you two can be our first ‘couple’ the rest of you pair up.”

She sits down at her desk and the class erupts in chatter from the students, everyone trying to find a partner.

“You didn’t have to do that for me,” Zach says, smiling at him.

Eugene shrugs, “I didn’t want to do it with a stranger either, I’d rather do it with you. Come on, let’s get our baby, we have to make sure it’s cuter than Ned and Ariel’s.” He says firmly, standing up.

Zach follows him up to the front, looking over all the babies in the bin in front of him, “should we get one that looks like one of us?”

“Is there one that’s asian with blue eyes, that would be perfect.”

Zach stands on his toes as he shuffles through the bin, pulling out exactly what Eugene asked for, “there, and it’s the cutest in the bunch.”

They grab one of the bags next to the bin and walk back to their table together, opening the baby’s diaper to figure out the sex.

“Well, it’s a boy.” Zach says, looking at it. “We need a name, something cute.”

“We’ve already decided on a name for our little angel.” Ned says, holding up his own baby, Ariel standing behind him.

Eugene and Zach look up, noticing the two standing in front of their table. “Yeah, what is it?”

“Jim, after my father. We’re going to call him Jimmy.” Ned coos at the doll, tickling its chin with his finger.

Eugene blinks at him before turning to Zach, ignoring Ned. “Our baby’s name should be Zorgon.”

“That’s… interesting.” Zach says slowly

“It’s from that movie, Zathura.”

“Aren’t they the villains in that movie?”

Eugene waves his hand, “details. I think it’s a perfect name.”

“You can’t name your child after a monster in a movie!” Ned yells at them.

“You’re right. It is the perfect name. Our little Zorgon.” He smiles, knowing it’ll only irritate Ned more.

“No! Stop this right now, take this seriously!”

“We are taking this seriously, and you should get back to your seat, your screaming is upsetting Zorgon.” Zach picks up his baby gently and rests him in his lap.

Ned huffs and holds Jimmy closer to his chest and marches back to his own seat, Ariel follows behind him, giggling, finding the boys teasing hilarious.

“Now that everyone has their partners picked, it’s time to go over the requirements for the baby project.” Mrs. Tibble brings everyone’s attention back onto her, standing up at the front of the classroom with a doll in her hands. “The project is very simple, it’s a week long, you’ll turn them in next Monday. In the bag you picked up you will find a feeding schedule as well as bottles and different clothes for the baby. You and your partner have to record yourselves taking care of the baby, you each have to show proof that you have changed their diaper, fed them, dressed them, put them down for a nap, taken them somewhere outside of school or your home, calmed them down when they’re fussy, and most definitely given proof that when they wake you up in the middle of the night you don’t just ignore them, you get up and take care of the baby properly. Each video must be at least 8 minutes long of you and your partner and includes everything I just mentioned. Obviously nothing inappropriate, and if you have to ask if it can be included in the video, it probably can’t.”

There’s a few giggles around the room at that, Zach being one of them leaning closer towards Eugene as he laughs.

Mrs. Tibble smiles at the reaction and sets down the baby properly, picking up a clipboard, “I’m going to go around the room now, asking for each of your partners names and the name of the baby so I know who is with who.” She starts to walk around, going to Ned and Ariel first, the two of them being in the front of the room.

Zach bounces Zorgon on his lap, smiling. “This will be fun, we’re always together anyway, throwing together a few clips of us and the baby won’t be so bad.”

“Yeah, it’ll be fun, plus we can harass Ned while we do it. Best project ever.” Eugene snickers, leaning back in his seat.

Mrs. Tibble comes up to them, writing on her clipboard, “Eugene Lee Yang and Zach Kornfeld, what is your baby’s sex and name?”

“He’s a boy, and his name is Zorgon.” Zach says, cradling the baby in his hand, showing him to her.

She looks up at them, “Zach, Eugene, I expected you two to take this seriously.”

He frowns, “It’s a name from Eugene’s favorite movie.”

“Oh, well that’s different,” she says, still giving them a weird look, “now how do you spell… Zorgon?”

“Z-O-R-G-O-N,” Zach supplies.

She nods and moves on to the next group, leaving them to talk alone.

“It’s not my favorite movie, you know. I haven't seen it since I was in middle school.” Eugene says, taking the baby from Zach’s arms.

Zach shrugs, letting Eugene take him. “I don’t want to change the name, it’s different, bothers Ned, and Keith will think it’s cool. What more do I want from a name?”

Eugene smiles, rolling his eyes a bit, “We can switch off with the baby, I’ll take her next period, you can have her after lunch, meet up at my locker to switch, we can decide later who has him for the night.”

“We can do a lot of cool stuff with him, and he can be best friends with Jimmy and whatever Keith’s baby’s name is.”

“Nah, Zorgon is too cool to talk to Jim. He can talk to Keith’s kid, but that ones on thin ice.” Eugene moves the baby’s hand to ‘push back’ the plastic baby hair, making Zach giggle.

 

Third period goes by pretty quick, Zorgon sits in the chair next to Eugene while he’s working on calculus, quiet the entire time, Eugene can handle this kind of baby, ones that are made of plastic and have an off button on the back.

He brings Zorgon to lunch where Zach was already sitting down with Keith and Ariel. Keith has his baby in his lap, bouncing his knee as he eats the sandwich he packed for lunch. Eugene walks up and sits next to Zach, placing Zorgon in Zach’s lap and putting his bagged lunch on the table.

“How was calc?” Zach asks, placing an arm around the baby in his lap.

“Was alright, Zorgon was good, didn’t make a single noise. The schedule says he should eat now though.” Eugene digs through the baby bag, pulling out the bottle and shaking it before handing it to Zach.

Zach wipes off his hands and takes the bottle, lifting it to the baby’s lips. It starts to make noise, coming out of the speakers in the back.

Eugene scrunches up his nose, “that’s weird, really weird.”

Keith laughs from across the table, “what did you think it was just going to stay silent the whole time?”

“I would prefer that, yes.” Eugene says, taking a look at Keith’s baby, “so what’s your baby’s name?”

“Becky and I decided to name her after somebody near and dear to my heart. Her name is Sandy, after Colonel Sanders.”

Ariel laughs next to him, “That’s beautiful, Sandy is such a cute name.”

“Better than Jimmy, that’s for sure.” Eugene says, taking a bite of the sandwich he packed.

“Now don’t be mean, Eugene, Ned is just very excited to have his own baby. He already volunteered to take him for the night.” Ariel says.

“Where is he anyway?”

“In line for lunch with Becky, he has the baby with him.”

Eugene rolls his eyes, finding that ridiculous. He pulls his phone out and opens the camera app, starting to record Zach while he feeds Zorgon. Zach is unaware until Eugene starts to narrate the situation.

“So Zach here is giving Zorgon the first meal, after he’s gonna have to burp him or something, I don’t know what’s what the instructions said.”

Zach looks up and laughs, “it’s like you’ve never been around a baby before, yes you have to burp them when they’re done eating.”

Eugene scrunches up his nose, “gross.”

“Man, how are you going to survive a night alone with him?” Zach says, placing the bottle on the table.

He picks up Zorgon and lifts him to his shoulder, patting his back gently. Eugene watches closely, taking bites of his sandwich while Zach burps their baby. It barely takes a minute, eventually the doll makes a burping noise, and Zach sets the baby down on his lap, rubbing it’s stomach.

He coos to the doll, “good job, Honey.” He says before looking back at Eugene. “See, now we’re done. It’s easy to take care of a fake baby.” He bounces the doll on his lap, picking up his sandwich again.

Eugene puts his phone away, giving Zorgon a weird look, “You can take it for the first night. I have a test tomorrow and I’d like to get sleep.”

Zach nods, “Alright.”

Ned and Becky come walking up to the table with their lunches in hand, Jimmy cradled in Ned’s right arm with his tray balanced on his left hand. Becky takes her seat between Ariel and Keith, kissing his cheek.

Ned places his tray down and sits next to Ariel, gently placing the doll in her arms. “Be careful with him, support his head.”

“You do know it’s not real, Ned. It’s important to me that you know it’s a doll, and not a real baby.” Zach says.

“I know that, but for the next week I’m his Daddy and he’s my precious baby boy and he needs to be properly taken care of.”

“I’m sorry, did you just call yourself Daddy?” Eugene says, looking up from his food.

“Yes, I’m his Daddy, Ariel is his Mommy.” Ned says firmly. “You two are your baby’s Daddies too, although calling you both Daddy will confuse him.”

“He can’t fucking hear, Ned.” Eugene deadpans.

Ned gasps and covers Jimmy’s ears. “How dare you swear in front of my baby! He better not pick up this bad behavior, if he does I’m coming after you.”

“Eugene you were right, Jimmy is too lame for Zorgon to hang out with.” Zach looks up at Eugene.

Ned slams his hand down, “I will kill you if you insult my son again.”

Zach giggles and leans closer to Eugene for protection, the other boy instinctively puts his arm around Zach, pulling him closer. Ariel puts her hand on her boyfriend’s shoulder.

“Babe why don’t you calm down a bit, eat your nuggets, I can handle Jimmy in the next few classes.”

Ned gives a final glare to the two boys across the table before nodding. “Fine.”

 

At the end of the day Zach meets Eugene outside by his car, he has everything he’ll need for his homework tonight, most of his attention will be on the baby anyway, he knows he won’t get much sleep, but he’ll be able to handle it, he hopes so anyway.

Eugene comes walking up to his car, Zorgon in one arm, keys dangling off the little plastic arm. “Zach check it out, new key ring.”

Zach laughs, pulling out his phone to take a video, “He looks beautiful, it’s a wonderful bracelet on him, so efficient as well.”

Eugene sets his backpack down and twirls Zorgon around in his arms, “I know, most fashionable baby around.” He pushes the baby’s arm out making Zach giggle more behind the phone.

“Come on, let’s go, I have a calc test to study for, and I’ve barely done any of the study guide, and understand nothing so far, so you have Zorgon tonight.”

Zach puts his phone in his pocket and takes the baby while Eugene unlocks his car, taking the keyring made bracelet off their baby’s wrist.

Zach buckles up, putting both their backpacks between his legs and Zorgon on his lap, under the seat belt with him. Eugene waits until Zach is safe in before starting his car, pulling out of the parking lot and starting their way home.

“I looked at the sheet,” Eugene starts, “the night doesn’t seem that bad, he’ll probably only wake you up once or twice. Neither of us have had to change his diaper yet, so you’ll probably have to do that tonight.”

“Gross,” Zach’s nose scrunches up, “but I’ll deal. There’s pajamas in the bag, I looked in it, but do you think Build-a-Bear clothes fit the baby? Or like, American girl doll clothes?”

“Why, do you have some?”

“My sister did, when she was way younger. I’d have to look but I could totally find some and we could dress him up in some better clothes. He could be as fashionable as you.”

“Like Daddy like son.” Eugene hums.

“The term is father like son.”

“Yeah, but Ned got me saying Daddy all day, it stuck.”

“If you’re Daddy, I wanna be Papa.” Zach says matter-of-factly.

“Whatever you want, buddy. He can’t hear so you can be Daddy too if you want.”

Zach shakes his head, “no, Papa is fine, I like it.” He bounces the doll on his knee.

Eugene pulls in front of his house and parks on the street, looking at Zach, “call me if you run into any problems, or call Ned he might actually know what to do.”

“Will do, see you tomorrow, and promise to actually get some sleep tonight, no matter how much you study it won’t matter if you’re running on pure motivation and caffeine.”

Eugene laughs, “Don’t worry, I’ll be in bed by one, I’ll get at least five hours of sleep.”

“Midnight, get six.” Zach says, opening the door, grabbing everything he needs before shutting the door and waving goodbye.

 

Zach walks inside his house and drops his backpack by the staircase as he makes his way to the kitchen where his mom is sitting.

“Hey mom, look what I got today.” He holds up the doll as he sets the baby bag on a chair by the kitchen table.

She looks up and smiles, “Baby project already?”

“Yup, Eugene and I got paired up, his name is Zorgon.” Zach says, handing off the doll to her.

“You better not be losing points for naming your baby that.” His mother says firmly, holding the baby in her arms.

“We’re not, I explained to her that it’s a name from a movie Eugene likes.” Zach sits down next to her.

“Yeah, why are you doing it with him and not a girl, isn’t it usually guys and girls together?”

He nods, “yeah, but there are more guys than girls in the class and I didn’t want to do it with a stranger, neither did Eugene, so Mrs. Tibble said we could do it together.”

“And you’re okay with that? Didn’t want to meet a cute girl to take care of a baby together?” She nudges his shoulder.

Zach scrunches up his nose, “ugh, no. I’m fine without it. I’m better off doing it with Eugene because we’re actually friends and I’ll have some fun with it. We have to record ourselves doing stuff with the baby too, Ned and Ariel have theirs and Keith and Becky also have a baby.”

“Sounds fun, your sister will be home in a bit if you need someone to help you record, dinner will be ready in a few hours, now get out of my kitchen.” She dumps Zorgon back into his arms and stands up.

He rolls his eyes and takes the baby, both his backpack and the baby bag, upstairs with him to his bedroom. He sets his backpack and the baby bag down on his bed. He props Zorgon up against his pillows and starts clearing off his room so there’s a nice space he can lay him down for the night.

He clears off the mountain of dirty clothes off the blue beanbag chair and picks up the floor around his room. He finds a few stuffed animals in the floor of his closet and sets them up on top of the large chair, along with a small pillow and a folded up throw blanket.

He picks Zorgon up and places him in the center of the beanbag, “there you go, Honey, a little bed for you.” He says, knowing he’s talking to just himself.

He steps back and picks up the rest of his room quickly, for the most part throwing the things he doesn’t care about or need in the closet, and putting his dirty laundry in the hamper in the bathroom.

He moves on to homework for a while, eats dinner with his Mom, Dad, and sister, who all promptly make fun of him for what he has to do with the baby, and that he named him after a monster in a movie, then went back and finished what was left of his homework.

 

Right before bed he calls his younger sister in the room to help film him taking care of Zorgon.

“Stephanie! Can you come in here, I need you to film me changing and dressing Zorgon!” Zach calls.

She walks up to him and takes his phone, “did you really clean your room for your stupid baby?”

“I cleaned it because it was dirty, has nothing to do with the baby.” Zach says, the spare diaper and pajamas for the baby stacked next to him.

“Okay, I’m recording now get on with it.” She says from behind the phone.

Zach nods and turns back to the baby, undressing it slow and properly, showing the video he can do it exactly right. He changes the diaper, yelling at his sister when she giggles at the naked baby.

“Stop objectifying him, Zorgon is just a boy!”

“He’s got a little acorn-”

“Stop! I have to show this to the class I can’t have my little sister swearing in it!” Zach whines loudly before she can say anything inappropriate.

She giggles some more, before quieting down behind the camera. Zach wraps the diaper on and finishes dressing him in the pajamas for the night before picking him up, resting the doll’s chin on his shoulder, taking him to the little bed he made for him, laying him down and tucking him in.

He goes back and takes his phone from his sister, showing the time before ending the clip and putting his phone in his back pocket.

“Thanks, Steph.”

She shrugs, “don’t wake me up in the middle of the night when it cries.”

“It has a name, and it’s Zorgon!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comment and Kudos please!! Next chapter will come tomorrow - hope for daily updates ~  
> You can contact me at [my sideblog kittenzach](https://kittenzach.tumblr.com/)  
> please talk to me i love when ppl validate my fics lol


	2. Tuesday and Wednesday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Playdates and Target trips

The next morning goes by pretty smooth, Eugene picks him up at six thirty the next morning, Zach had a pretty restful night before, he was only woken up by the baby once. He took care of what he needed and fell back asleep with the baby in his arms on his beanbag, he just forgot to record it.

Their day at school is pretty simple, passing the baby off to each other between classes like the day before. The schedule forces them to feed the baby during first period, but since almost the whole junior class is doing this project, it’s not exactly weird to burp a child over your shoulder while you’re supposed to be learning world history.

Ned showed up to school with a baby wrap that goes across his chest, keeping Jimmy inside, so he can use both his hands. Everyone finds it ridiculous, Mrs. Tibble is thrilled that he’s getting so into this project.

Eugene, Zach, Ned, and Keith all decided to go to Ned’s house after school to do homework and study together, they’re not all taking the same classes, but being in the same room while other people are working seems to get their own motivation up to finish their own work.

They make it a ‘playdate’ for their three babies, Jimmy, Sandy, and Zorgon. The name still infuriates Ned, but he suffers in mostly silence now. 

Ned had the same idea as Zach did the night before, creating a little space to keep his baby in while he does other work, only he went extremely overboard, and made an entire corner of his bedroom specifically for Jim, instead of just a small beanbag like Zach.

 

“Holy shit, Ned.” Keith says as they walk into his bedroom, seeing Jimmy’s area.

“What can I say, only the best for my little boy.” Ned presses a soft kiss to the doll’s head before setting him down, propped up by one of the pillows.

Eugene and Keith follow, each setting their baby down so they’re all facing each other in a three person circle. 

Zach pulls out his phone and films the situation, panning around to show the three babies sitting together. “So, it’s official, Ned has lost it,”

“Hey!” Ned shouts in the background. 

Zach giggles behind the camera, “Sandy, Zorgon, and Jimmy are having a playdate, while their dads all suffer and have to do their homework.” 

Keith groans in the back as the camera pans to him pulling out his large Econ book. Eugene plops himself next to Keith, pulling his own backpack onto his lap. Zach turns the camera off and sits on the floor, under the couch, pulling out his notebook and history book.

Eugene keeps his legs on the ground while Keith sits up on the couch, long legs crossed with his books on his lap. Zach leans back, resting againsts Eugene’s legs as he begins to work on his assignment.

“Didn’t you have Jimmy last night, why do you have him right now?” Keith asks Ned after a few minutes of silence.

Ned looks up from his algebra book, “Ariel had a doctors appointment, I’m dropping him off later on tonight.”

They keep the small chatter going for a while, talking while they work, complaining about how much work they have to do all before tomorrow, how well behaved their babies have been the night before.

After a few hours one baby starts to get fussy, crying, causing the other two to start crying right after. The four boys groan and all of them stand up, going to the corner to calm the crying dolls.

Zach gets his phone out and pushes Eugene in front of him, “you do it, I’ll film you taking care of it to meet the requirement.” 

Eugene nods and waits for Zach to start filming before he bends down and picks up the doll, holding it over his shoulder, bouncing it slightly. He walks back to the couch and sits down, Zach sitting next to him, switching the camera to show the both of them as Eugene attempts to calm the baby down.

“Shhhh, Honey, it’s all right.” He says the the baby, trying to get him to stop crying. “It’s still crying.” He says after a minute.

Zach laughs, “well yeah, maybe he needs something, have you checked his diaper? Maybe he’s hungry.”

Eugene checks his diaper and scrunches up his nose, “gross. Hand me the bag I need a diaper” 

Zach giggles and Keith throws a diaper at them, it hitting Eugene in the face. 

“Hey! That could have hit Zorgon!” He says, setting the baby on his lap, putting the diaper next to him. 

Zach films him changing the doll’s diaper, watching him grimace as he takes off the dirty one, rolling it up and handing it to Zach before he finishes wrapping the baby in the clean diaper Keith gave him.

Eugene pats the dolls butt, “there, Honey, now you’re all clean.”

“Have you never changed a diaper before?” Zach asks, turning off the camera. 

“I have, but it’s still gross that the diapers actually get dirty even though all we do is give it a fake bottle. I don’t understand, I don’t want to understand. It’s just gross” 

“I guess, but it doesn’t smell. It’s just like a dry mark on a disposable diaper.” 

“I still don’t like it. It’s gross.” Eugene says, lifting the baby back up on his lap. “We should go soon, Ariel’s back from her doctor’s appointment, right Ned? It’s getting late you should probably drop Jim off.” 

Ned nods, Jimmy is calm in his arms, Sandy has quieted down in Keith’s as well. Ned already has everything he needs to drop the doll off packed up, so the other three boys quickly pack up their stuff and head to the door.

“Ready to go Zach?” Eugene asks, still holding Zorgon.

“I live closer, I can take-” Keith starts, only to be interrupted by Eugene.

“No, I got him, come on, Zach.” He walks out before Keith can so much as open his mouth to debate again.

Keith looks at Zach confused, who simply shrugs back and follows Eugene out to his car, skipping over to him, grabbing onto his arm and swinging it. Eugene laughs and pushes him off, towards the passenger side of his car.

 

That night Eugene stays up most of the night to finish an english paper, he filmed himself putting the baby to bed, but forgot to film when the baby was actually awake in the middle of the night. He brushes it off, he’ll have a few more nights with Zorgon, he’ll have another chance to film.

 

\---

 

The next morning Zach slips into the front seat of Eugene’s car, seeing Zorgon in his lap. “I really don’t think it’s safe to drive with the baby in your lap.”

Eugene yawns, “he liked it, even asked to beep the horn.”

Zach giggles, he takes Zorgon from Eugene’s lap, “come here, Honey.” He says before buckling himself in as Eugene pulls out of his driveway. “Yeah, I’m sure he did. Why are you yawning, did he keep you up that late?”

The other boy shakes his head, “no, I was up most of the night finishing that stupid english paper. It’s done, printed, and in my backpack, I’m going to turn it in and not look at it for another three months, because that’s how long it takes for him to grade papers.” 

“Eugene! It’s not healthy to be up all night, you need sleep!”

“I’m fine, I have study hall first period, I’ll take a nap then. The only problem is that I forgot to film myself with Zorgon in the middle of the night, so I’ll have to do that some other night.”

“Yeah, so do I. We should probably start putting the clips we have together in an ongoing video too, just so we don’t have to edit it all Sunday night.”

Eugene nods, “yeah, send me the clips you have and if I don’t sleep during study hall I can get started on the video.”

“Sure, also Keith last night said something about him and Becky going to target with Ariel and Ned as their ‘going out into the world’ section and said we should tag along.”

“You really wanna play fifth and sixth wheel to those couples?” Eugene raises an eyebrow.

Zach shrugs, “we’ll have each other if they get too coupley, plus we can totally harass them while we’re there, it’ll be funny for the video.”

“Sure, if that’s what you want, we’ll take Zorgon with them to target.” Eugene parks his car in the school parking lot, leaning over Zach to grab his backpack off the floor. 

 

Their day at school is uneventful for the most part, Eugene took Zorgon for first period, spending half of it resting his head on his desk with Zorgon in his lap, and the other half of class cutting together the film they have already done.

At the end of the day the six students meet outside the band room doors, Keith’s last class of the day. Eugene is carrying both Zach’s and his own backpack while Zach holds Zorgon. Ned has Jimmy in the carrier while Ariel leans against the wall next to them.

Keith walks out with Becky a few minutes after the last bell, french horn case in one hand, Sandy in the other. 

“Ready to go?”

“Yeah, we’ll meet at the one by that Costco like five minutes down the road.” Eugene says, pulling his keys out of his pocket.

They all agree and separate to their cars, Zach sitting with Eugene. “You didn’t have to carry my bag, I can carry that and the baby at the same time.”

“With how clumsy you are? No way.” Eugene says, pushing both backpacks to the backseat. 

“I’m not  _ that  _ clumsy.” Zach grumbles, sinking back into his seat, holding Zorgon to his chest. 

“Yes you are, but it’s okay, you have me to help you.” Eugene flashes him a smile.

Zach rolls his eyes, “yeah, what would I ever do without you, my knight in leather armor.” he pokes his friends jacket.

 

They pull up to the target not long after, parking next to Keith’s car in the parking lot. They leave their backpacks in the back seat of Eugene’s car and walk inside of the store, where their four friends are waiting.

“Do we need a cart?” Keith asks.

“Yeah, we can put the babies in them so we don’t have to carry them around the whole time.” Zach says, pulling one out.

Zach places Zorgon in the baby seat of the cart, next to where Becky placed Sandy, “Aww Honey, you have a friend.”

Ned makes a scoffing noise behind them, “if you all had a baby carrier like me, you could keep you babies close to you and have your hands free.”

“Not all of us are insane, Ned.” Eugene says, taking the handle of the cart and pushing it through the first aisle.

“You’re just jealous that I’ve bonded better with my son than you have with yours.”

“It’s a doll, Ned, there is no bonding with a doll.” 

They bicker for a few minutes after that, going back in forth about the babies and Ned’s obsession with believing his is actually real. Becky and Ariel hang back a bit from the boys, following them around but for the most part talking to each other.

“Hey, Zach,” Keith speaks up, looking at the cart. “You wanna ride in the cart? Eugene and I could totally push you around.”

Zach pauses for a moment, looking at the cart, he could step in pretty easily, getting out might be a struggle but his friends are nice enough to help him out if he really does need help. He puts his hand on Eugene’s arm to get him to stop moving before wordlessly walking over to the side of the cart, stepping on the bottom bar with one foot for support, and throwing his leg over to get inside.

Eugene laughs, pulling out his phone to record once Zach is settled inside the cart, legs crossed, back to the front of the cart so he’s facing the babies in their seats.

Eugene zooms in on Zorgon, then Sandy. “We’re out at target today, we have all the babies in the cart, Zorgon, Sandy, and Zach!” He zooms out to show that Zach is sitting in the cart.

Zach grins and sticks his tongue out at Eugene before reaching for the phone, recording from the inside of the cart, focusing on the babies.

“How fast do you think I could go with Zach in the cart?” Eugene asks aloud.

“I don’t know but you should totally run through the chip aisle, and Zach should try and grab his favorite snacks of the shelves.” Keith says.

“No, that’s a terrible idea and extremely dangerous for the babies!” Ned exclaims, putting a hand on the cart. 

Eugene, Keith, and Zach all share a look for a brief moment before Eugene takes off, pushing the cart and running as fast as he can to get to the snack aisle. Keith lets out a loud laugh and runs with them, mostly trying to get away from Ned’s wrath. 

Ned all but shrieks, running after them, his hands supporting Jimmy in the carrier on his chest, yelling, “That’s not safe for the babies!”

The girls stop walking and turn around, they’ll meet up at the front when they’re ready to go home, they got their video proof in the car and on their way inside the store, it’s not necessary to trail behind them the whole time, especially when they’re wreaking havoc on the employees of the store.

 

“Eugene stop running! Zach get out of the cart!” Ned yells as he runs after them. 

Zach giggles from the cart, filming Eugene running, Keith next to him, and Ned not far behind yelling at them. He reaches out with his other hand and grabs a pack of double stuffed oreos as they pass by them. 

Eugene lets out a loud laugh when the cookies land in Zach’s lap. He makes a harsh left turn and runs across the store to the electronic aisles, stopping in front of the big TVs, breathing heavy from all the running. 

Zach giggles in the cart, still filming as Ned and Keith catch up to them, Keith laughing just as hard as Zach while Ned’s face is red, both from running and from anger. 

Zach cuts off the camera and turns in the cart, unable to control his laughter. Eugene dips his head, resting it on the handle of the cart as he laughs.

“That was so dangerous! You could have tipped the cart over and seriously hurt Zach or broke one of the dolls!” Ned shouts, taking deep breaths between every couple words. 

“Relax, I was fine, he wasn’t even going that fast.” Zach says, “and the babies are buckled in to the cart.” When Ned shakes his head Zach frowns, “would it make you feel better if I share my Oreos with you?” 

Ned pauses for a moment, looking at Zach for a while before he nods. “Yeah, Okay. I’ll accept that.”

Zach grins and lifts his arm up, “Eugene! To the check out counters! And pass by the clothing section too, we lost the girls they might be there.” 

Eugene lifts his head up and starts pushing the cart again, at a much reasonable pace this time. Keith and Ned walk next to the cart, Zach opens the pack of oreos and hands each of his three friends a cookie, he’s going to pay for it anyway.

They find the girls by the front of the store, next to the seasonal stuff, looking through everything that’s on sale.

Becky notices them first, tapping Ariel’s side to bring her over to the boys. “You guys done harassing the poor underpaid employees?” 

“I’ll have you know that we didn’t get stopped once by any employee.” Keith says, wrapping his arm around her shoulders. 

“I’m sure they just ignored you instead.” She pats his chest.

“How were the babies?” Ariel asks, placing her hand on Jimmy’s back. 

“They had the best time of their little robot lives.” Keith says, lifting Sandy out of the cart. 

Eugene pushes Zach to the self checkout, letting Zach scan the Oreo package and pay for it while kneeling up in the cart. He takes the receipt and places it in the bag with the cookies.

Eugene takes his phone out and films Keith and Ned both holding the cart down while Zach swings his legs over the side. The cart shakes a bit as Zach jumps out, falling on his ass. 

Eugene laughs behind the camera, Ariel walks over and helps Zach off the floor. He brushes himself off and thanks her before taking Zorgon out of the cart, mumbling a quiet “come here, Honey,” and holding his bag of Oreos.

Zach looks outside the stores clear automatic doors. “Oh, it’s raining.” He frowns, holding Zorgon close to his chest.

“Here, take my jacket it has a hood, you’ll be able to hold Zorgon and keep him dry.” Eugene hands the phone to Ariel to record while he takes his jacket off and wraps it around Zach’s shoulders, putting the hood up.

Zach holds Zorgon close to him, turning to the camera and gives a thumbs up. 

Across from them Ned raises an eyebrow at Keith who only shrugs backs. 

 

Zach takes Zorgon that night, once again forgetting to record himself taking care of the baby. He doesn’t think anything of it at the time, he has until Sunday to do it. 

Eugene and Zach continue to put together their video in their respective study hall periods, sharing the file with each other every time they add something new.

Zorgon is a pretty well behaved baby, he only wakes them once a night, only cries when he needs something simple, like he’s hungry or needs to be changed. It’s most likely a cause of his programming, but he’s heard horror stories from other classmates that their babies are awful, and keep them up all night, so they’re grateful.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comment and Kudos it's how i measure my self worth, I'm really happy people are liking this fic! Next chapter will be up tomorrow!!  
> You can contact me at [my sideblog kittenzach](https://kittenzach.tumblr.com/)  
> please talk to me lol


	3. Thursday through Sunday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fashion shows, Movie trips, and Sleepovers

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i think i liked writing this chapter the most

After school Zach wraps his arm around Eugene’s as they walk out to his car. “I found all my sisters old Build-a-Bear and American Girl Doll clothes if you want to hang out tonight we could record us dressing him in a bunch of different outfits.”

Eugene pulls his keys out of his pocket and unlocks the door, “yeah, I don’t have anything due tomorrow so I can hang out for a while.”

Zach slips into the passenger seat, keeping Zorgon on his lap under his seatbelt with him. “Cool, you can stay for dinner if you want, my mom always likes when you stay over.” 

Eugene hums, “Okay, I can take Zorgon for the night too, since you had him last night.”

“Okay, make sure you get actual sleep instead of staying up the whole night working on homework.”

Eugene rolls his eyes, pulling out of the school parking lot. “Yeah, yeah, okay.”

“I’m serious.”

“So am I, relax Zach, I told you I don’t have any homework tonight.” Eugene says, looking over at him. 

“Okay…” Zach says, still a bit suspicious. 

Eugene is known for staying up very late on school nights and falling asleep during study hall and lunch instead of sleeping through the night. Zach worries about him, he worries for all of them, but mainly Eugene. 

“Really, I’ll get enough sleep.” Eugene says, softer.

 

Eugene gets to Zach’s house pretty quickly, they go inside, say hello to his mom, tell her that Eugene’s staying for dinner before disappearing upstairs. Zach kicks away some of the clutter on the floor and hands off Zorgon to Eugene before he grabs the bin of doll clothes.

Eugene sits down on the floor with the baby in his lap and Zach sits next to him, putting the bin in front of the two of them, propping up his phone on a pile of books, resting against the beanbag chair Zorgon sleeps on.

Zach waves at the camera in front of the two of them, “I found a bunch of doll clothing in my sister’s old toy boxes and they look like they’ll fit Zorgon so we’re going to put on a fashion show of all these beautiful outfits. Most of these are for girls, but our baby doesn't conform to traditional gender roles and will dress in whatever he wants.” 

“I want to go first.” Eugene pulls the bin closer to him, shuffling through the clothes. 

They’ll edit these parts out, building the outfits and most of the changing, if they didn’t it’ll be boring and last way too long.

Eugene pulls out a purple dress with a handbag and matching shoes. It’s obviously meant for an American girl doll, but the outfit will fit Zorgon just fine. He takes the onsie that he’s currently in and dresses him up in the new outfit.

It’s a little awkward towards the butt, Zorgon’s diaper showing through, but other than that the dress fits the doll pretty well. He lifts him up to the camera, spinning him around to show all sides of the dress.

“He looks beautiful!” Zach smiles, putting the purse around the doll’s wrist.

They spin the doll around again before Eugene hands him to Zach, who places him in his lap before shuffling through the bin and finding a forest green hoodie and a jean Build-a-Bear skirt. 

Zach dresses him quickly, the skirt has a hole in the back that’s meant for a tail but Zach ignores it, showing off Zorgon’s new outfit to the camera.

“I think he looks cute.”

Zach shakes Zorgon’s butt and Eugene takes the doll from him and sets him in his lap, “stop objectifying my son.” He pushes Zach playfully, only to get a giggle in response.

They shuffle through the box of clothing together, Zach quickly finding something he likes, grabbing it and bunching it in his hands, giggling as he puts it next to him, making sure Eugene can’t see it.

He pulls out a few more pieces while Eugene dresses Zorgon in a neon green t-shirt with a printed honey pot on the front, a pair of Build-a-Bear jeans. 

“He looks amazing!” Zach exclaims, watching Eugene move closer to the phone to show his outfit off. “He’s got a little honey pot on the front. A honey pot on our Honey, so cute!”

“He looks a little ridiculous.” Eugene laughs, twirling the doll around in front of the phone. “This is totally something you’d wear.”

“Without the hole in the butt of the pants, yeah, I would.” Zach giggles. “Now give me I have the perfect outfit.”

Eugene raises an eyebrow but hands the baby over to him. Zach turns his back towards Eugene, not letting him watch what he’s dressing the baby in. He giggles a lot as he does it, straightening out the clothes before he lifts Zorgon up, showing both the camera and Eugene.

He’s dressed Zorgon in a pair of black jeans and a white t-shirt with a leather jacket over it, exactly what Eugene is wearing. Zach bursts into giggles when he sees Eugene’s expression of shock on his face.

Eugene stares at the baby for a moment before pushing the box of clothes behind them and taking the baby, a genuine smile across his face. He turns him around to show the camera every part of what the baby is wearing. The diaper pokes out the back of the jeans but it doesn’t matter to the boys.

“Look at that, dressed just like his Daddy. Kids got some style.” Eugene says, laughing a bit as he looks over the outfit.

Zach attempts to stifle his laughter, “yeah! He looks just like you! He looks so cute.”

“Damn right he does.”

Zach leans on Eugene, unable to hide his giggles anymore, he presses his face into Eugene’s shoulder and closing his eyes tight as he laughs. Eugene looks down at him, a light pink dusting the tops of his cheeks, nothing Zach will notice at the time.

“Boys, Stephanie, dinner!” Zach’s mother calls from the bottom of the staircase.

Eugene stands up and Zach leans over and turns off his phone camera, recording that much drained its battery. He leaves it on the charger next to his bed and walks with Eugene downstairs, Zorgon staying in his new outfit.

 

\---

 

Eugene fell asleep the night before with Zorgon in his arms, the baby actually slept through the entire night, not waking him up, so he didn’t get the chance to record himself taking care of the baby.

Their classes go by pretty quickly for it being a Friday, Zach gets off with light homework for the weekend, Eugene on the other hand has an entire history project due Monday that he completely forgot about.

He’s complaining about it in the car with Zach on their way home from school, “I have to do the entire project in a weekend, and I really don’t want to do it.”

“I could help you if you want.” Zach offers.

Eugene shakes his head, “no, I’ll be fine. You’re taking Zorgon tonight, and tomorrow if you could keep him all day and I can take him for the night that’ll be great, I’ll be able to finish the project in a day if I work all day tomorrow.”

“And tonight.” Zach supplies.

Eugene hums, “nah, I put it off for this long, wanna go see a movie instead of going home?”

Zach laughs, “Eugene! Bad plan, but yeah, I do.”

Eugene grins and takes a right instead of his usual left to Zach’s house. He drives them to the nearest movie theater. Eugene parks in front of the theater and lifts up the center council between the front seats, pulling out two small bags of candy, handing one to Zach.

“Shove this in your pocket so we don’t have to pay for snacks.”

Zach takes it and puts it in the pocket of his hoodie, it’s too big on him anyway, so it looks natural, not at all that there’s a pack of skittles in there.

He holds Zorgon in front of him as they walk inside, there aren’t too many good options to pick from, but they’re already there, and don’t feel like going home, so they pick the first action movie that sounds good.

They get settled in their seats, lifting up the arm rest so Zorgon can sit between the two of them. Eugene shifts, leaning towards Zach, his shoulder brushing against the other boy’s.

Zach sits back in his seat, one hand touching Zorgon’s little plastic hand as the previews end and the movie starts.

The movie itself isn’t all that great, it’s full of explosions, which admittedly are cool, but there’s an unnecessary side romance plot that has both boys rolling their eyes the whole time. About halfway through, Zorgon starts to cry between them.

Zach acts quickly, picking up the doll and rushing out of the theater as fast as he can, trying not to disturb the other seven people there. He goes over by the bathrooms where there’s a small seating area and bounces Zorgon in his arms.

He checks his diaper, but it’s not dirty, he pulls the bottle out of his hoodie pocket but no matter what he does the doll won’t stop crying. He starts to get a bit annoyed, Zorgon won’t calm down no matter what he does to him. 

“Shhhhh, Honey, come on, there isn’t anything to cry about.” Zach whispers to the doll.

Eugene comes walking out of the theater with his phone in his hand, recording Zach as he walks over to him. “You check his diaper?”

Zach looks up, a bit shocked that Eugene is out here with him, “yeah, he’s not dirty, not hungry either. You didn’t have to leave the movie for this, I had it.”

Eugene flips the camera to show the both of them, he places a hand on Zorgon’s back, comfortingly, “yeah, I know, but the movie was boring, I’d rather be with you.”

Zach shifts closer to Eugene, “thanks.” He says quietly.

It barely takes a few minutes, but Zorgon calms down, settling in Zach’s arms now that he has both of them there.

“Look at that,” Eugene says softly, “he’s asleep.”

Zach nods, lifting his head up and giving Eugene a big smile. Eugene smiles back, dipping his head down a bit, but Zach turns away, looking down at the doll in his arms.

 

Zach takes Zorgon again for the night, it’s a pretty calm one, but he once again forgets to take a video of himself taking care of the baby. It’s fine, he’ll have him again Sunday. His day is pretty calm, he hangs around the house with his parents and little sister, keeping Zorgon with him the whole time.

He texts Eugene here and there throughout the day, asking how his project is going, or random things that happened throughout the day. Eugene texts back all the time, complaining about his work load or responses to Zach’s texts.

Zach gets to Eugene’s house around six with Zorgon and his baby bag in his hands, he originally plans to just drop Zorgon off and go right home, but Eugene’s mother dragged him into the house and forced him to sit at the dinner table with their family.

Zach sits next to Eugene, Zorgon in his lap. His sisters are sitting across from them, giving Eugene glances that Zach doesn’t even want to try to decipher. Zach makes Eugene laugh at one point, both girls give their wide eyed looks that make no sense to Zach. Eugene just looks at his lap and mumbles something to them in Korean. 

Zach gives his friend a confused look, Eugene just waves it off and puts something on Zach’s plate to try instead of talking about it. Zach accepts it and they move on to a different topic. 

After dinner Eugene, knowing Zach had walked here, drives him home. “I’m almost done with the project, whatever I don’t finish tonight I’ll finish tomorrow after I wake up.”

“That’s good, Zorgon will be good company while you work.”

Eugene looks over at him, “yeah. I’ll text you tomorrow, maybe we can hang out after I finish my work.”

“That’ll be great.” Zach grins wide.

Eugene looks back to the road, a small smile tugging at the ends of his lips. He pulls up to Zach’s house and waves him goodbye, staying in front of his house until he watches him go inside safely before driving away.

 

\---

 

The next day Zach gets a phone call from Eugene at three in the afternoon, surprising him, Eugene never calls, he’s very much a text person.

“Hey, Eugene, what’s up?”

“Hey, I forgot to get a video of Zorgon and me at night all week, can I keep him for the night so I can record one for class?”

“Damn, seriously? I forgot too, it’s so hard to remember when you’re half dead in the middle of the night.” Zach says into the phone.

Eugene curses on the other line and it’s quiet for a moment before Zach speaks up, “what if you sleep over tonight? I know it’s a school night, but if it’s for a project I’m sure your mom will let you.”

“I’ll have to ask her, I finished my project an hour ago, and don’t have any homework to cram tonight, so it’s a maybe. If all goes well I’ll be at your door by seven.”

Eugene’s at the door by six thirty, his backpack in his hands, along with Zorgon and the baby bag. Zach lets him inside and they go straight upstairs to his bedroom.

“I can’t believe with both forgot to film ourselves with the baby at night.” Zach says, sitting down on his bed.

“Neither can I, you don’t want to do anything in the middle of the night other than try and make him quiet so you can get back to sleep. I’ll just take the footage we get and add it in during study hall and have it all finished on a flash drive to give to Mrs. Tibble before class starts, you’ll have to take Zorgon during first period though, I won’t be able to pay attention to him and work on the video at the same time.”

“No problem, he’ll sit with me during Algebra, usually he’s pretty well behaved during that time of day anyway.”

Eugene sits on Zach’s bed next to him on his bed and pulls his phone out and opens the camera app, showing the two of them, “so, me and Zach both forgot to film ourselves taking care of Zorgon during the many, many, times he woke us up at night, so we’re doing that part together.”

Zach nods, “sleep over on a school night!” 

Eugene rolls his eyes fondly and stops the recording. “I’ll put that in front of whatever we record tonight.”

Zach nods, approving of the idea, he pulls his laptop on his lap and the two of them get comfortable on Zach’s bed, just talking to each other for hours. They facetime Ned and Ariel, only to see Ned holding Jimmy very tight in his arms, clearly upset it’s his last night with the doll.

Zach finds it hilarious, but secretly he’s going to miss his own doll, sure it’s been annoying to wake up in the middle of the night to a crying baby, but he’s had a lot of fun this week with his friends, specifically Eugene, he’s going to miss that a lot.

 

Around ten Zach starts to yawn, resting his head on his arm as he lays down, watching something on his laptop. Eugene looks over and smiles softly at the sleepy boy in front of him.

“You ready for bed, Zach?” He asks quietly.

Zach looks up and nods, rubbing his eyes. They put Zorgon to bed around eight, and he has been sleeping soundly since then, they’ll be woken up in a few hours, they know that, but for now it’s all quiet. 

Eugene sets his phone down next to Zach’s alarm clock, they decided using his phone for all the recordings tonight will be best, since he’s the one putting the video together tomorrow morning. 

Zach shuts his laptop and places it on his desk across the room before he starts changing. Eugene strips off his shirt and kicks off his pants, changing in front of each other used to be something they got embarrassed about, but after being friends for so long, and many sleepovers, the two of them, along with Ned and Keith, have stopped caring about what the other boys see.

Zach changes into a large t-shirt and a pair of basketball shorts to sleep in, Eugene on the other hand stays in just his underwear. It’s nothing Zach isn’t used to, neither is sharing a bed, which is what they’re going to do tonight. He’s slept in a queen sized bed with his four best friends, sleeping in a full with Eugene is nothing new to him. 

Zach sleeps on the side where his bedside table is, next to the alarm clock along with both his and Eugene’s phones on the charger for the night, they put them there so they don’t forget to record like they had for the previous week. He crawls in and snuggles into the blankets, Eugene gets in on the other side after turning off the lights, he settles under the covers, resting his head on the pillow, closing his eyes.

They’re both asleep within moments.

 

It’s been hours but it feels like only a few minutes to them when they’re woken up by Zorgon crying in his beanbag chair. Eugene groans and rolls out of bed, slugging over to the chair, picking the crying doll up and carrying him in his arms.

Zach lifts his head up and grabs Eugene’s phone off the table next to him, he opens the camera app and shows the time on his alarm clock first, 3:04 am. The sounds of Zorgon crying are heard behind him. 

“I think he’s hungry, can you grab his bottle?” Eugene’s sleep stricken voice asks Zach.

Zach nods and walks to Zorgon’s bag, grabbing the bottle out of the pocket, “Eugene is with the baby right now,” he tells the camera, “and he’s not wearing a shirt, so beware. Sorry, Mrs. Tibble.” 

He flips the camera to show him and sits down next to Eugene, holding his arm out to film both of them. He uses his other hand to start feeding the doll in Eugene’s lap, Zorgon quiets down significantly once the bottle is in his mouth. 

“Here you go, Honey, nice and easy now.” He says softly.

Zach rests his head on Eugene’s shoulder, watching the baby eat, waiting for him to stop and fall back asleep. Eugene isn’t looking at the doll.

After a few moments Zorgon falls asleep and Zach is able to take the bottle away from his mouth. Zach yawns and turns his face into Eugene’s side to hide it before pulling back completely.

He rubs his face and Eugene shakes his head a bit to try and rid the blush that has most certainly found it’s way to his cheeks, up to his ears.

Eugene takes the phone from Zach, getting up, “I can put him down.” He says quietly.

Zach rubs his face turning and going back to bed while Eugene walks back towards the beanbag chair, placing Zorgon down and tucking him in, taking his time to make sure he won’t wake up again in the night.

“Good night, Honey.” He whispers.

“Eugene, come back to bed, ‘m cold.” Zach whines from his bed.

“Yeah, yeah. I’m coming.” Eugene says, stepping back from Zorgon.

He crawls back into bed, keeping the phone recording. He gets closer to Zach than he was before, so he can lean over and record the glowing numbers on Zach’s alarm clock, 3:22.

Zach moves closer to Eugene as he pulls back, Eugene is still recording the two of them. Eugene looks down at him, he’s soft and sleepy and snuggling closer to him as he begins to fall asleep again.

Eugene can’t help but lean down, pressing a soft kiss to Zach’s unsuspecting lips. Zach mewls softly, snuffling closer to Eugene. Eugene turns his phone off, setting it down on the bedside table next to him before settling back down, and falling asleep within moments.

By the time Zach’s sleepy brain process what happened and his eyes fly open, Eugene is already almost asleep. Zach debates this in his his head for a moment, but it’s three thirty in the morning, and he’s tired.

He decides that’s a tomorrow problem.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :)  
> Comment and Kudos please!! I live off validation!!!  
> You can contact me at [my sideblog kittenzach](https://kittenzach.tumblr.com/)  
> if you have any questions or just want to talk about Zagene!  
> The last chapter will be up tomorrow!


	4. Monday

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Saying Goodbyes and Bathroom Confessions

Eugene is the first one awake the next morning, he slips out of bed and gets dressed while Zach groans and curls himself in the covers, nuzzling his face into the pillows. He doesn’t want to get out of bed, partially because it’s cold outside of the covers, but mainly he doesn’t want to face Eugene and what happened the night before.

Eventually he does get out of bed, after Eugene rips the covers off of him. He dresses quickly, brushing his teeth and washing his face in record time before going out to the car with Eugene, and everything they need for the day.

Eugene has everything he needs for his history project, along with everything else he needs for the day. They make sure to remember all of Zorgon’s stuff, everything is packed away in the bag ready to be returned to the teacher.

They don’t talk in the car ride.

Once inside the school they separate immediately, Zach going straight to his class while Eugene goes to the library, spending study hall there so he can finish the project where it’s quiet.

 

Zach gets to their health class first, sitting down in his seat and staring at the desk. Eugene walks in a few minutes after, going up to Mrs. Tibble, handing her the flash drive and talking for a moment before going to sit next to Zach.

They don’t talk.

The rest of the class piles in, Ned and Ariel sitting in the front of their class with Jimmy sitting on their lap. Zach wants to make a joke to Eugene about how Ned might cry when he has to put Jimmy away.

He doesn’t.

Mrs. Tibble puts all the flash drives she got from her students in a hat on the table and shakes it up before reaching in and grabbing them at random, that way she isn’t forcing any of her students to go first.

They’re all pretty standard videos, a boy and a girl struggling to take care of a fake baby. There’s a few funny moments in each of them that have the whole class laughing, but Eugene and Zach stay quiet the whole time.

They’re the third group to present their video. Mrs. Tibble pushes in the flash drive to the school computer and gets the video all set up, the class quiets down and she presses play.

 

The video opens with Zach in the lunchroom, Eugene filming him feeding Zorgon in his arms while everyone around the table eats. Eugene narrates the situation in the video, Zach watches himself look up and giggle at the camera. Zach remembers Eugene’s exact expression, a small smile from his giggle that faded into a grimace in response to the baby.

The clip after that is of Eugene in the parking lot the next day, dancing around with Zorgon, his car keys hanging off his little wrist. Eugene’s smile is a direct result of of Zach’s laugh, he knows that because he watches Eugene’s normal expression changing the second he heard Zach’s giggles from behind the camera.

The next clip is of Zach, his little sister recording him changing Zorgon’s diaper and into his pajamas. The whole class laughs when his sister talks and Zach has to yell at her to not say anything inappropriate, but Zach is still stuck on the previous two clips, he’s noticing things in a new light and he’s not too sure how he feels about it.

The screen goes black then opens up with Ned on the screen, looking very offended, Zach is making fun of him. The class, once again, laughs while Ned turns around and glares at Eugene and Zach. Eugene’s eyes are stuck on the screen, not looking anywhere else, Zach playfully sticks his tongue out at Ned, pretending that nothing is wrong. The camera pans away from the three babies on Ned’s floor to Keith on the couch, groaning loudly before it cuts off.

It opens again with Eugene picking Zorgon off the floor and taking him to the couch, Zach flipping the camera to show the both of them. The class laughs again when the diaper hits Eugene in the face, the video is full of Zach’s giggles as Eugene changes the diaper, commenting on how gross it is, even though it’s only a fake baby.

Zach remembers that same day Keith offered to take him home, but Eugene refused, making sure he was the one to take Zach home.

The clip after that is Eugene putting Zorgon to bed at a regular time, his hair is all over the place, the laptop on the desk, next to the makeshift baby bed, lit up with a half written english paper. As he puts Zorgon down and lifts the camera back up to show the class he’s asleep Zach notices a framed picture of Eugene and himself sitting in Eugene’s backyard, on the porch swing together, Zach’s legs are laying Eugene’s lap as he looks up at the clouds.

He doesn’t remember this picture being taken, Eugene isn’t posing either, it must have been Eugene’s mother taking it while neither noticed, and Eugene liked it enough to frame it, and place it on his desk.

The next clips starts by focusing on Zorgon and Sandy in the cart, zooming out to show Zach sitting in the cart with his legs crossed. He playfully sticks out his tongue and it cuts to Zach recording Eugene from inside of the cart.

When they start to race around the store the whole class laughs, especially when Ned starts screaming behind them, telling them to stop. Eugene’s laugh when the cookies land in Zach’s lap makes Zach’s heart flutter even now, watching it back again. The clip ends, focused on Ned’s angry face, there’s an extra loud laugh from Ariel in the front and a whine from her boyfriend next to her.

It cuts to Zach climbing out of the grocery cart while the other two boys hold it steady, when he falls on his ass the class lets out a collective giggle along with Eugene from behind the camera.

Zach makes a comment about the rain and suddenly Eugene is handing the phone off to Ariel and wrapping Zach in his jacket. Zach didn’t realize it at the time, but that’s an extremely romantic gesture. He notices in the background Ned and Keith are having a silent conversation, clearly about the two of them.

Zach’s hands grip the side of his chair, he can’t believe he missed all of those gestures and subtle glances as they happened.

The next clip opens with Zach and Eugene sitting on Zach’s bedroom floor with the box of toy clothing in it, and Zorgon in Eugene’s lap.

_ “I found a bunch of doll clothing in my sister’s old toy boxes and they look like they’ll fit Zorgon so we’re going to put on a fashion show of all these beautiful outfits. Most of these are for girls, but our baby doesn't conform to traditional gender roles and will dress in whatever he wants.”  _

Zach remembers this pretty clearly, he doesn’t think that anything really happened in that. The video is mostly the two of them going back and forth, showing Zorgon in different outfits. Zach still stands by that the purple dress Eugene dressed him in was very fashion forward.

In the video Zach starts giggling to himself, he notices now that Eugene’s face spreads into a small smile the second he starts laughing. Zach lifts the doll up and shows off how he dressed Zorgon exactly how Eugene is dressed.

_ “Look at that, dressed just like his Daddy. Kids got some style.” _

The entire class laughs at that, along with Zach in the video, who presses his face to Eugene’s shoulder, only now does he notice the light blush dusting his cheeks, he’s sure that he’s not the only one who sees it. 

That clip ends and it opens again with Zach standing in a corner by the bathrooms of a movie theater, holding a crying Zorgon, Eugene recording it. Zach sinks back in his seat, hearing Eugene say that he’d rather be with Zach and a crying baby doll than in the movie. His eyes widen as Eugene dips his head down, but in the video Zach turns his head back to the baby, completely ignoring the gesture.

The next clip is days after the movie theater incident, the night before. It’s the two of them sitting on Zach’s bed together, Eugene holding the camera.

_ “so, me and Zach both forgot to film ourselves taking care of Zorgon during the many, many, times he woke us up at night, so we’re doing that part together.” _

_ “sleepover on a school night!” _

He watches Eugene’s eyeroll land back on him, watching him with a soft expression before the camera cuts. He knows what’s coming next, he doesn’t know what Eugene left in the video, but no matter what, Zach isn’t ready to watch it play back.

It opens with Zach’s alarm clock, bright green numbers showing 3:04 am, and Zorgon crying in the background. 

_ “Eugene is with the baby right now, and he’s not wearing a shirt, so beware. Sorry, Mrs. Tibble.”  _

The class giggles when it pans over to Eugene sitting on Zach’s bed, cradling Zorgon in his arms. The camera switches and shows the two of them together, Zach putting the bottle in Zorgon’s mouth.

Zach keeps his eyes on Eugene on the screen, he isn’t looking at Zorgon like Zach thought he was the night before, he’s looking straight at Zach, watching him feed the doll. Eugene edited all of this, he must know how he sees Zach in this shot right now, he’s looking at Zach with such a fond expression he can’t even begin to explain it.

It cuts from the baby falling asleep to Zach rubbing his face and Eugene shaking his head, the yawn completely edited out. Eugene stands and puts Zorgon back in his bed, tucking him in around all the stuffed animals.

_ “Eugene, come back to bed, ‘m cold.” _

Zach’s eyes go wide, they’re locked on the screen, he vaguely remembers saying something like that, but he didn’t realize how domestic it sounds, how it must sound to everyone else in the classroom.

Eugene leaves the baby and goes back to bed with Zach, he leans over and shows the clock, 3:22 am, twenty minutes had passed, as Eugene settles back and shows the two of them in bed, Zach has moved much closer, Eugene starts to lean in and the video cuts off, going black.

Ned turns in his seat to stare them them. Eugene is pointedly looking only at the screen in front of them as Zach is looking at his desk, his hands gripping his chair so tightly his knuckles are turning white.

The class claps when it’s over, they’ve done that for each one so far, it’s a little awkward, it was an abrupt stop at the end of the video instead of the two signing off like the previous ones had. 

Zach’s hand shoots up into the air before Mrs. Tibble can pull out the next flash drive. She looks up and calls on him.

“Yes, Zach?”

“May I use the bathroom?”

“Of course. Be sure to take the hall pass.” 

Zach basically jumps out of his chair, grabbing the hall pass, a leg from a broken baby doll with the room number written on it, and runs out of the classroom and down the hall.

Ned quickly turns back to his seat and takes out his phone, typing something quick before resting it on top of his books.

 

Zach runs to the nearest bathroom, splashing his face with cold water to wake himself up a bit. His mind is running a mile a minute, replaying the scenes from last night over and over again, remembering the kiss, the gentle press of Eugene’s lips on his own, he can’t get it out of his head, he’s not sure if he wants it out.

He’s drying off his face with a paper towel when he hears someone else walk inside the bathroom, footsteps on the tile floors.

“You doin’ okay, Zach?”

Zach lifts his head up in shock, “Keith? What are you doing here?”

“Ned texted me, said you ran out of the room in a rush, wanted to make sure you were doing okay.” He holds up his phone, showing him the texts.

Zach looks them over and steps back, throwing away the paper towel in his hand. “Oh, I didn’t know he was going to do that… Did he say anything else?”

“No, why is something wrong?” 

Zach shifts his weight from one foot to the other, “I… I don’t know, really.” He pauses, trying to find the right way to say this, he has no problem confiding his feelings in Keith, he’ll always help him figure it out. “Eugene spent the night last night.” He starts.

“Oh, did you finally figure out that you have a huge gay crushes on each other?” Keith asks, pretty bluntly.

Zach flushes, taken aback, “I- what? How do you know- I mean I don’t- Keith!”

Keith laughs, shrugging, “well Eugene’s was obvious, he’s always treating you differently than us, plus the whole doing this project with you? He knows loads of girls in that class, he wanted to do it with you. I didn’t notice you liked him back until this week. so was I right? Did you guys say anything to each other last night?”

Zach wraps his arms around himself, “he kind of… kissed me last night…”

“He kind of or he did?”

Zach sinks back, he debates just going back to class on his own, but he knows that’s a bad idea. He should talk this out with Keith before he sees Eugene again. In the entire time he’s known his four best friends he’s never dated anyone, never went past more than a few kisses with a girl, saying all this stuff now is embarrassing. 

“Last night, after he put Zorgon back to sleep, he came back to bed and went to film the clock that was passed me and when he settled back down he just… he leaned in and kissed me.”

“What did you do?”

“It was three thirty in the morning, I wasn’t expecting it at all, I was half asleep. I didn’t process what happened until a few minutes later but by then he was already asleep. We haven’t talked about it.”

“Well you should.”

“I  _ know _ that, Keith! I just don’t know what to say, I don’t even know how I feel. I haven’t even thought of Eugene like that until today! How do I start a conversation like that when I don’t know what I want the endgame to be?”

“I think you do know, Zach. You just don’t want to admit it to yourself.” Keith says softly. He steps closer and places a comforting hand on his friends shoulder.

“I know that I’m confused.” Zach mumbles.

“Well, I think you just don’t want to ruin a perfectly good friendship by trying to date, but if anything that’s why dating would work so well, you’re just that good of friends already. Really you dating Eugene, nothing would change, you’d still be the only person he accepts affection from, you’d still be the person he volunteer to take home after school, he’d still give you his jacket when it rains, he’d still give you those soft looks and smile when you laugh over something that isn’t funny at all. You’d still tackle him in hugs and hide behind him when Ned gets mad over something stupid, he’d still be the first person you text when you want to talk or hang out with someone. I don’t think much would change at all.”

Zach looks at his shoes and stays quiet for a long moment, mulling over what Keith said to him. After a bit he lifts his head up, “You really think so?” He asks softly.

Keith gives him a gentle smile, “yes, I really do.”

Zach lets his arms drop from around himself and holds them out, “can I have a hug?”

Keith grins and steps closer, wrapping Zach in a tight hug, “of course you can, buddy.” 

Zach presses his face into Keith’s chest, letting himself be held by his best friend for a moment, it’s nice, after his minor (major) freak out. Keith pulls back and touches the tip of Zach’s nose, getting him to smile.

“Go back to class, and talk to Eugene before lunch if you can, I don’t want to sit at a table with the two of you all awkward.”

Zach laughs lightly, wiping his face, “yeah okay, I’ll try. I’ll see you in a few hours.”

They walk out together, Keith going to the right once they leave, Zach walking left, going back to his health class. He quietly opens the door and sets the pass down where he grabbed it. The class is currently watching Ned and Ariel’s video.

The scene on screen is Ned and Ariel setting up the little playpen for Jimmy, the class is laughing, thinking it’s a joke while Ned stares a little teary eyed at the screen, watching himself and Ariel play with their doll.

Zach quietly slips back into his seat, Eugene doesn’t react. Zach pulls his notebook off his stack on the table, discretely ripping a piece out and writing something on it, folding it up and passing it over to Eugene.

He looks straight ahead as he watches Eugene read the note, and write out his own reply before passing it back.

Zach resits a small smile as he glances down to read it, he relaxes and spends the rest of class convincing himself he’ll be okay.

 

‘Meet me in the math wing bathroom halfway through next period’ -  Zach ~(^‥^)

‘Okay.’ - Eugene (^._.^)

 

Zach spends the rest of that class stressing about what he’s going to say, over thinking just about everything, he knows that Eugene was the one who initiated the kiss last night, and all they really are going to do is talk about what it could mean for them, it’s not like anything bad will happen. 

Ultimately he decides to wing it, he can’t really come up with a plan for this kind of conversation, especially when he’s so nervous.

At the end of class they have to put back their babies, Ned gets a little emotional, which in turn makes Ariel emotional as well, they bonded with Jimmy, having to give him up isn’t something either really want to do.

Zach and Eugene go up together, placing Zorgon gently back in the box. Zach feels a pain in his heart as he does it, he didn’t think he got attached to the doll but he really did, putting him back in the box is surprisingly hard. 

“Bye, Honey.” Eugene says quietly from behind him. 

“We’ll miss you.” Zach adds before they walk away from the box together, back to their table to grab their stuff and leave the class.

 

In Zach’s next class he watches the clock the entire time, ignoring everything his teacher at the front of the class. He waits until exactly halfway through class before sticking his hand up in the air.

“Yes! Zach do you have the answer?” 

Zach blinks, realizing his teacher asked the class a question, and no one responded, “uh, no. May I use the restroom?”

His teacher sighs, wiping his face, “yeah, take the pass.”

Zach grabs it on his way out, all but sprinting his way through the halls, going to the mathwing and running into the bathroom. He slows down to a jog when he gets to the entrance, walking inside.

Eugene is already there, he stands up straight when Zach walks inside. Zach takes a breath, then another couple after. 

Eugene can’t help but let an amused smile slip. “Did you run here?”

Zach holds up one finger, bending over a bit, hands on his knees, “yes.” He says, standing up straight again.

Eugene turns and leans against the sink, watching Zach, “So, why did you want to meet?” 

Zach shifts, “you know why, I wanna talk.”

“About?”

“Last night… You know…” Zach trials off.

“Say it.” Eugene presses.

“The kiss. You kissed me last night. That, I want to talk about that.” Zach spits it all out in a rush.

“Okay, what about it?”

Zach whines, “you know what about! You kissed me last night, without warning, one minute I was falling asleep the next your lips were on my face! I’d like to talk about that, Eugene.”

Eugene shifts, his usual stoic demeanor falling apart in front of Zach, “we don’t have to talk about it. We can just ignore it, pretend it didn’t happen.”

Zach frowns, “but I don’t want to.” He says before he can stop himself.

Eugene looks up, staring into Zach’s eyes, “you don’t?”

Zach shakes his head, “I don’t. I just… I didn’t know what to make of it at first. I was so tired when it happened I didn’t fully process it until a few minutes after, but by then you were asleep, and in the morning I was already over thinking it so I just ignored you. I’m sorry for that, but during class, after I ran out, I went to the bathroom, and Keith was there and he helped me calm down.” Zach steps a bit closer as he talks, playing with his own fingers, a nervous habit.

“Keith was there?” Eugene tilts his head.

“Yeah, I guess Ned texted him to meet me in the bathroom. He talked to me about some stuff, helped me realize a few things.”

“Realize what?”

Zach shifts, looking at his hands, “that you like me? That everything in that video was real, and not just for show, and everything that happened this past week was just a lead up to last night, and now, this conversation.” He takes a small breath and lifts his head up, “that I like you back?”

Eugene takes a hesitant step closer to Zach, “is that a question or a fact?”

“Fact I think.” his hands let go of each other and instinctively reach for Eugene. “I don’t think.” He says quickly after, “I know.”

Eugene steps forward, meeting Zach in the middle, taking his hands, “yeah? You know?” He smiles lightly, clearly still a bit afraid.

Zach nods, “i-it’s gonna take a bit of time to get used to, I only just realized it a few hours ago, but yeah, I know.”

“That’s okay, I can wait, I’ve been waiting a while.”

“Don’t have to wait too long, I’m a quick learner- wait. A while, how long is a while?” Zach looks up at him.

Eugene looks up, away from Zach, “not that long… just… since… freshman year?”

“We’re juniors, Eugene!” Zach shouts.

“In my defense I thought you would have figured it out by now but you really didn’t. I’ve been trying to get your attention for a while.”

“I can’t believe I strung you along for this long.” Zach’s hands go from Eugene’s forearms up to his shoulders, “I’m so sorry.”

“You weren’t exactly stringing me along, you didn’t know I was into you.” Eugene looks down at him.

Zach’s hands find their way to Eugene’s neck, “I should still make it up to you somehow.” He stands on his toes.

Eugene smirks down at him, “oh no, I have just no idea what you could do to make it up to me, this was such a terrible-”

“Oh shut up.” Zach giggles, closing the gap between their lips.

It’s soft, a gentle press of their lips. Eugene’s hands go to Zach’s waist, he controls most of the kiss, guiding Zach, knowing he hasn’t done much of this kind of stuff before. Zach presses a bit closer to him, only to jump back when he hears footsteps of another person walking into the bathroom.

Zach stares, face flushed red, at the wall in front of him while Eugene quickly spins around, putting both hands on the side of the sink, staring at the drain.

They get some weird looks from the other student, who quickly does his business and leaves them behind without any words spoken.

“I guess doing this in the bathroom wasn’t my best idea.” Zach mumbles.

“It was probably for the best,” Eugene laughs, a real honest laugh that brings a bright smile to Zach’s face, “if he didn’t come in then I don’t think I would have been able to stop.”

“I don’t think I would have been able to either.” Zach admits, “you know, I won’t have much homework tonight, if you wanna come over. We can catch up on lost time, since apparently you’ve been after me since Freshman year.” Zach pokes at Eugene’s chest.

Eugene catches Zach’s hands and brings them up to his mouth, kissing them softly, “I’d love to.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Comment and Kudos please!! I live for attention  
> Well there it all is, the last chapter!!! I had so much fun writing for this ship I didn't know I could get so attached, anyway I don't have any more ideas for this ship so I'll prolly go back to writing for the Hitchhiker Au but who knows I might get hit in the face with some inspiration for something new  
> You can contact me at [my sideblog kittenzach](https://kittenzach.tumblr.com/)  
> if you ever just wanna talk about the Try Guys <3


End file.
